You don’t have to be a marketing wiz to figure out that three-day weekends can help boost a film’s money-making potential tremendously. Labor Day should be a time for movie distributors to rejoice by capitalizing on an extra day of box-office income,  but it’s doubtful crowds will storm theaters to check out the poorly-received,  low-concept offerings which are currently leaving their stink in venues nationwide.
 
Last week’s female-skewing college  comedy “The House Bunny” couldn’t  top Ben Stiller’s controversial movie-within-a-movie “Tropic Thunder” in its second week; and TV star Rainn Wilson didn’t even manage to crack the week’s top-10 grossing films as “The Rocker.”

This week’s offerings are equally offensive to discerning movie fans, who will have to sit patiently at home with their Netflix subscriptions until this cinematic rough spell passes.

Amid marginal reviews and horrific  limited-release box office receipts, “Hamlet 2”  expands its theatrical run, bringing the story of an eccentric high school teacher’s (Steve Coogan) offbeat musical adaptation of Shakespearian tragedy to Augusta.

The flick’s highlights include “SNL”  comedienne Amy Poehler as an overzealous lawyer, plus actress Elisabeth Shue (“The  Karate Kid,” “Leaving Las Vegas”) poking fun at her own recent lack of big screen visibility.

The name says it all for “Disaster Movie.” The fact that the writing and directing  team from the “Scary Movie” series keeps offering awful actress Carmen Electra gainful employment is enough to warrant riots or at least a carefully organized popcorn boycott at venues offering this mindless motion picture.

A free-for-all of sorts at taking shots at  better big screen releases, this cheesy spoof takes aim at a colorful variety of crowd pleasers including “Enchanted,” “Sex  and the City: The Movie,” “Iron Man”  and “Juno.”

If I had a nickel for every time I heard someone say, “Gee, I can’t wait to see Vin Diesel back on the big screen,” I’d be completely… broke. The former action star (“The Fast and the Furious,” “XXX”) has played a dangerous game with his career only to find that if you’re gone from the public eye long enough, people inevitably stop caring.

Making matters worse, Diesel gets his geek on in “Babylon A.D.,” which finds him playing escort and protector to a young woman who is being whisked away from an extremist religious group in a futuristic fantasy city.

As if last week’s mockery of higher  education, “The House Bunny,” wasn’t enough, there’s another film just waiting  to make college students look like irresponsible dingbats.

“College” stars  former Nickelodeon TV golden boy Drake Bell as a high school senior who tries to fit in with some rowdy frat boys while checking out a college with his geeky friends.

Wait just a minute, moviegoers! There appears to be a diamond hidden in this cinematic landfill. OK, maybe it’s more comparable to cubic zirconium, but it’s the week’s best bet.

Respected actor Don Cheadle (“Crash,” “Hotel Rwanda”) is a suspected terrorist on the run from both the FBI and the Muslim group he had previously trusted in “Traitor.” Jeff Daniels (“Dumb & Dumber”) and Guy Pearce (“Memento”) also star in this action-packed thriller, the story for which was conceived in part by actor-comedian Steve Martin.

Movie Buzz is a column by Mariah Gardner. It appears in the Metro Spirit every Wednesday.